Thursday, August 6, 2015

I'm In Love With a Wonderful Guy: The Origin Story

This Sunday, August 9th, will be the 3 year anniversary for my boyfriend (who, like in my previous post, will be referred to as Darling Gamer Boy, or DGB for short) and I. I figured I would tell the story of how we met in honor of us being together this long.

I was a sophomore in college and I needed a history course to take. Because I wasn't a senior, I didn't get first pick of my classes, so I was left with limited options. Because it seemed the most interesting, I selected Russian and Soviet History. I walked into class and sat down in the middle, next to this blonde Californian boy in glasses and a leather jacket. Little did I know that this boy would become the love of my life.

He introduced himself to me, I introduced myself to him, and soon we were taking the cramped elevator up to class together and talking about a variety of things: theatre, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, comics, video games, social justice, etc. He made me laugh, he was smart, he was cute, he played the electric bass, and before long I began to fall pretty hard for him. There was a problem though...

This was right around the time I was on OKCupid and Fetlife, trying to navigate who I was and whether I was dateable. I was in an on-and-off... involvement with another boy I will only refer to as jerkface. Jerkface only saw me as a walking fleshlight, and that's about all you need to know about him. In the midst of my turmoils with jerkface, I was dating various dudes from the Internet and dealing with uncomfortable messages from both OKC and Fet, to the point where I eventually deleted both accounts. Not to mention, DGB also had an OKCupid account (he found mine, actually, and told me we were a 72% match. Go figure) and a day before I was planning to ask him out, he talked about his new girlfriend that he had found on the site. Needless to say, I was crushed, but he was sweet and we stayed friends. We even began having lunch together and walking each other back to our dorms. We started hugging a lot. I friended him on Facebook and admired him from afar... but we were still just friends.

Summer came, I was back in MN, and he was in California. I had finally broken it off with jerkface (blocked him on my phone and everything) and was in a healthy involvement with someone I played D&D with (he doesn't know this, but I credit D&D guy for helping me realize I was likeable AND for showing me what a friends-with-benefits relationship should be like). I was watching Star Trek and getting my life back together. Jerkface was mentally abusive, so it was very much a journey to find out what I liked and what I wanted to do. Transvestite Soup, the Rocky Horror Picture Show shadow cast in MN (they put on a great show, if you've never been, go) was doing their yearly Geek-themed show in July, so I put together a sexy Star Trek costume and brought my younger sisters along, because it is my job to corrupt them as much as possible. I posted this picture as my Facebook profile pic after the event:

DGB, being a fan of Star Trek as well, commented on the picture. That lead to an over 150 comment thread long conversation. That then lead to Facebook messaging, beginning on Aug. 9th, 2012. When I asked him about his girlfriend, he had mentioned that they had broken up and the relationship didn't last long. We talked longer about various things: superheroes, sexuality, etc. The Facebook messages lead to phone calls. The phone calls lead to Skype sessions that would last until 5am. By the time it was September, we were desperate to get our arms around each other.

Since then, there have been many trials and tribulations: deaths, lay offs from jobs, unwashed dishes, etc. But despite our differences (remember, 28% of us isn't compatible), DGB means the world to me. He's helped me in my journey to self love and body love by being the first guy to not just tolerate my belly, but actively point how beautiful it is. He's helped me learn more about video games and helped me get through some of the harder parts (damn you Water Dungeon in Ocarina of Time). He's taught me so much about music and film and helped me come out of the pop culture rock I've been under my whole life. He watches Harry Potter and Disney films with me despite not being big fans of it himself. he helped me embrace my bisexuality and helped me come to terms with my queer-ish identity. He really is the sweetest, and I couldn't ask for a better partner. He's my darling gamer boy and I love him. Sometimes we fight, sometimes there are days when he frustrates me, but at the end of the day, I'm glad to have him in my life and I hope he sticks around awhile.

So I'll end the post on this: When I visited him in California for winter break, I had been pestering him because we didn't have a song, and "if you're in a relationship with someone, you've got to have a song, I mean come on!" So he picked this. He played it on the car radio and we spent a good chunk of our time just singing along to it.  Enjoy.

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